Game Shows

On Sunday, I made the mistake of moving one of four TV's in the house into the dining room. Now I am glued to bullshit shows while I eat my meals. Tonight Jeopardy was followed by Wheel of Fortune. It got me thinking of game shows over the years and all the nonsense that occurs on those shows.

Jeopardy is cool, but you have total fuckin' nerds on there that know so much useless information that you KNOW these people aren't getting laid regularly. That Ken Jennings dude was cool, you know the guy who won like 74 consecutive Jeopardy matches, but you know he has not been laid since the Nixon administration. Alex Trebek, the host, is a good guy but he acts like a big fuckin' know it all with the answers on cards in front of him. When people get it wrong he's like "No, the correct answer was _______" in a tone like he knew it all along.

Wheel of Fortune is a show I hate more than anything. Pat Sajak is a total douche bag. His own talk show got canceled after like half a season. Vanna White has made millions turning lit up letters. Now the lazy bitch does not even have to turn them, she just touches them. Is having her on the show really necessary? I like when the stupid people have like $8000 in their bank and are too stupid to solve it so they spin the wheel and more times than not, they hit that bankrupt space. I love it and usually laugh my ass off.

The Price is Right is another annoying game show. Bob Barker is how old now, 101? He has been in and out of court for sexually harassing those model chicks. Those models annoy me too. The run their fingers over everything when they show it to the camera. It's a fuckin' box of Rice A Roni, you are not making it look any better! The contestants on there are straight out of the trailer parks. They are so fuckin' stupid. They play the price game and are asked what costs more this 12 pack of D batteries or this box of lipton soup. And then they are like "uuuuuhhhh the soup Bob?" Then you have the 500lb women who try to spin that showcase showdown wheel. Their tits are sagging to the ground and they put all their weight into the spin and almost bust the fuckin' wheel. Then you have the weak people who can barely spin the thing.

Family Feud blows too. They had that Richard Dawson host back in the day who used to tongue everyone. That guy kissed more women than Wilt Chamberlain. Then they had another host who ended up hanging himself. There have been a bunch of hosts since then. They always put the stupid ass family member at the end of the line hoping the questions won't get to them. Those families were quite a sight. What rock did they dig these families out from under? The best part of Family Feud was the bonus round, although one family member of the two that can play in the bonus round always fucked things up and got like 40 out of the 200 points needed to win it all. You know they were disowned when their sorry ass got on the plane home. On the rare occasions they did win the money at the end, why did they all stand in a circle jumping up and down to the theme show music? They looked so fuckin' stupid.

I used to like that "Press Your Luck" show. You know the one with those "whammys" that would dance across the screen and jack people's cash. I loved when people would lose their money. I think they changed the name to "Whammy" now, it's not the same.

I hated the Newlywed Game. They'd always used the term "whoopie" for fucking or banging and it bothered me. Just ask, "What was the strangest place you and your wife ever banged?" That sure sounds better than the strangest place you ever made "whoopie."

There have been so many game shows I can't even get into them all.....for the most part they all blow.