Sesame Street

Sesame Street has been an American institution for the past 31 years or so. All of us have watched it, enjoyed it, and learned from it while growing up. Even today, the parents that grew up on Sesame Street are now watching it with their children. What amazes me the most about Sesame Street are the characters on the show and their purpose.


One Fucked Up Bunch 


For instance, what purpose does Oscar the Grouch serve? He sits in a garbage can heckling people, bitching about his miserable life, and just being as negative as one can be. Is this little green fucker really necessary? I mean come on, it's been 31 years, put this fucker out for the trash already and put him out of his fuckin' misery. I'd love to see him crushed in that compactor with his can.

Then there is Snuffleupagus, he is definitely on the pipe. He mopes around, slurring his speech, and talking like a a crackhead. What is he, an elephant, a mammoth? He needs to fuckin OD already and die. He is useless and will end up on welfare collecting off my hard earned tax dollars..

Grover was the first recorded case of ADD and the first Ritalyn recipient. He was always hyper and yelling and jumping around. He is just a fuckin' moron with an IQ of about 20. What does he teach kids, how to be a fuckin' idiot?

Ernie and Bert are homosexual (not that there's anything wrong with that) and we all know it. Yes, they haved separate beds, but somehow they always end up in the same bed. They haung out in the tub together quite often as well. That isn't the rubber ducky Ernie is always reaching for.

Big Bird, what is his story? He is a whiney ass bitch too. He serves no purpose but to be the street's drama queen. He is in everyone's business causing all kinds of problems. He is like an old fuckin' washwoman. All he needs are the rollers in his fuckin' feathers. He is a bitch.

Then there is cookie monster. A blue blob of crap that eats cookies and growls. Recently they put his ass on Weight Watchers and told that fucker he can't be eating cookies all the time.

It's amazing we learned from this crew. I suppose there's a Bert, Ernie, Cookie, Oscar, Grover, Snuffleupagus, and Big Bird represented in all of our lives.