I think prostitutes should sell gift certificates. This would be the perfect secret santa gift for the loser in the office that you know hasn't been laid since the Johnson administration. It would also be a perfect gift choice for that perverted uncle or the nymphomaniac in your life.
Cash or Charge? Gift Certificate please!!!!
These gift certificates could be sold in denominations. $20 for a half hour with a crack whore, $100 for some quality time with a fine street walker, or $1000 for a few hours with a "classy" call girl.
If you don't want the gift recipient to know how much you spent, you could just give them a gift certificate for specific sex act. "This coupon entitles you to one 15 minute blow job" or perhaps "This coupon entitles you to one hour of anal sex with the hooker of your choice". Nothing says Christmas like an anal encounter with a hooker.
Of course these certificates would have to be signed and approved by the pimp at the time of purchase, but hey, it's money in his pocket and there should be no issue or problem completing the transaction. With the holidays not too far off in the distance, why not think ahead now and get the pervert or unfuckable person in your life the gift that keeps on giving?
14 comments:
[insert me shaking my head] HOLY SHIT!!! You know what? Thats a great idea!! wait! wait!! you know how many people use hookers and how many woman make that their full time job? there are atleast 5 hookers on every corner here in Philly. Seriously. Tis the season!!
Better include a pack of condoms with that gift!
Great idea, nothing says you care more than a good 'ol bangin
Dude! Is this your way of telling me what you give you for xmas? heheheehehehe kidding - you know i luv you!
Whoa Baby...
You're stressing out, aren't you? You need a vacation--and not with a hooker... ;)
Only teasing...just relax--it's Friday thank goodness.
Damn, darlin'. Hitting the bottle a wee bit early, ain't ya? ;)
The only problem with that scenario is that the Pimp is likely to deny the transaction ever happened once he has your money, and then the gift certificate is null and void... then again, what a way to screw your 'friend' by giving him a fake hooker gift card! ;)
I think you might have a problem cashing in that gift certificate. Most of the pimps I know aren't the most trustworthy sort.
I've already given out various sexual gift certificates to people I was dating at the time or someone I thought was Hot! We both enjoyed their redemption! :)
Oh no, I can't stand XMAS! I want summer all year round. As for the gift certificates, Hollywood actors would be lining up for them.
I hate the holidays - just b/c I'm single :op
Aside from the whole prostitution being illegal thing, it's a great idea!! LOL
What do us girls get for Xmas then? ;)
That's why I've been giving my brother American Express giftchecks all these years.... LOL!!
Well I suppose my Dad MIGHT like that. For sure my brother........
How did you know what I was going to get you? Darn, you ruined the suprise. :{
~Jersey Danielle
You can even set up a toll free number, 1-800-GET-LAID to sell the things. Go for it!
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