Waiting On Line at Supermarkets

Don't you just hate waiting on long lines at supermarkets? I always seem to pick the wrong line. The line where the old lady is writing a check always kills me. Checks should be BANNED at stores now in the day of debit. There is absolutely no reason to write a check at a store! You always think you are outsmarting everyone by getting on a line that is shorter, and then it happens. Someone bitches that the price on the fuckin' Uncle Ben's Rice is wrong and they send a fuckin' search and rescue team to aisle 7 to investigate while you stand there like an asshole with your 3 items. I hate when the cashier tells you, "after you I'm closed" and they expect you to play traffic cop and tell everyone that gets behind you that she's closing. Hey bitch, are you paying me to do this shit? I'm not a Waldbaum's employee, tell them yourself. I've tried to be the nice guy before by telling people she's closed after me and they give me attitude like I'm shutting her down for her break. There really is nothing to do when you wait on line but wait. I look in people's carts to see what they are buying. When it's a really heavy person with all junk food, I can't help but think mean thoughts and think to myself, "no wonder you are fat." I know it's mean, but I can't control my thoughts. I would never say anything mean like that to anyone, but I think it. I also look in my own cart and evaluate what I'm about to buy. Most of the time, I'll drop an item or two when I think to myself "do I really need this?" Then you get to the beginning of the belt. You are greeted by the tabloids and all the hysterical headlines. "President Bush Meets With Alien Leaders" and there's a "picture" of him around a big table with the aliens. Then you start putting your stuff on the belt. You are trying to keep it all together and they keep moving the belt. The asshole on line in front of you rarely puts the divider thing down for you so you have to reach across his/her groceries to get it. Then when it's your turn you have to give them your "store card" to get the sale items. I have fuckin' 100 of these in my wallet for every store I shop at. Why can't it just come off automatically? I like to bag my own groceries, not only to help the cashier, but I like all my frozen shit together and my refrigerated stuff together. I hate when you are trying to get to the spot to bag and the person who just checked out is checking their receipt, looking through their wallet, chatting on a cell....all the while your shit is piling up, your bread is getting mashed by 10 cans of soup. and your blood starts boiling. It's like moooove bitch, get out da' way, get out da' way! (Thanks to Ludacris) Then it's time to pay, you have like 10 options now. They always ask you if you want cash back when you are paying with debit. If I wanted cash back I'd ask!!! I love food shopping, but I hate the checkout!