Post Christmas Post.....

  

Ok, so I think this picture I took on the train Saturday Night is hysterical. Two girls (you can only see one) drinking (or in this case, holding) Red Bulls, completely passed out. I am sure the Red Bull competitors would love to use this pic. This is my kind of humor, for sure.

So Christmas was good, but quiet. Weird with the family so far away, but still a nice holiday, complete with cooking and friends. I made a ton of food. Baked Ziti, homemade sauce, meatballs, sausage (Sugar V's favorite), and Bracciole, for Christmas Day. Christmas Eve I cooked flounder. I had to keep the tradition going. Not to mention all the Italian cold cuts, cheeses, breads, pastries, and cookies I waited so patiently in line for on Sunday.

Thursday Night I am having Caren over along with Christina and Joe for dinner. I have a tray of ziti and a ton of meat left that I froze. We will be sure to have a post holiday feast. I wish Sugar V and the Mrs. were in NY to share it, but they are off In Chitown.....we miss them!

So, for New Years, I am NOT having a party at my house for the first time in a while. Sugar V is having Caren and I over...and maybe a few others. It is sure to be a fun night. I am looking forward to it. Even more so than I was looking forward to Christmas. There's nothing like starting the New Year off with the people you really care about. And a kiss from Caren at the stroke of midnight won't hurt either. :)

I was flipping around the channels early yesterday and I can't believe they still show the "yule log" on TV. What a mess that thing is. You seriously have to be hard pressed for something to "watch" to put that on.....

Is it me, or are you tired of holiday music? If I hear one more Christmas song, I may snap. I seriously had to play gangsta rap in the car today to get all the holiday "cheer" out of my system. I can now go back to being the cynical bastard I am the rest of the year......

The city was great on Saturday Night. It felt like a mid-October night rather than the day before Christmas Eve. Caren and I walked the city and loved every minute of it. We found some cool gifts for Sugar V and the Mrs., to give them on New Years Eve. We tried a new restaurant in Little Italy, we liked it, but missed Vincents. We had dessert at Ferrara's, got me a "Dominick the Italian Christmas Donkey T-Shirt" at a novelty store in Little Italy, then found a place that sold designer handbags and stopped in. We were led to a secret back door in the back of the building where there were dozens of Gucci, Prada, and other designer bags. I am sure these were hijacked off a truck or a plane, but the price was good, so Caren got a bag and a wallet. That made her night for sure.......

So, how was your Christmas...and what is everyone doing for New Years?????

My 100 Memories of 2006

  

With 2006 winding down and many networks airing their end of year specials such as "The Most Fascinating People Of 2006" or "Big in '06", I decided to make a list of 100 memories that will forever remind me of 2006. So here goes, in totally random order:



1) "Ridin' Dirty"
2) Club 69
3) Carpooling with Christina
4) Fall/Early Winter NYC visits
5) My job (started it in January)
6) Caren
7) Christmas in August
8) The infamous block party
9) The Cinco De Mayo "housewarming" party
10) A great Memorial Weekend
11) Christina, Joe, and their boat "Floater"
12) Tiny A
13) The Tube Music Network
14) Melky Cabrera's catch on 6/6/06
15) The Boston Massacre in late August (5 game sweep in Boston)
16) Sugar V clearing out my New Years party
17) Eleanor Rigby's Bar
18) T-Unit
19) The famous Pizza Night at club 69
20) Mario!!!!!
21) Being called "Scotty" for 2 months
22) Fourth of July weekend in Mineola
23) Frosty Paws
24) Bruce dressed as a pimp
25) Happy Hours at Tiki Bar
26) The "Shady" Hat
27) Coney Island/Brooklyn Cyclones Game
28) 10 Cent Wing Nights
29) Taco Tuesdays!
30) Kettle One
31) Friday BBQ's at work
32) The Bodies Exhibit in NYC
33) Little Italy with Caren
34) A full house on Thanksgiving
35) February 15th, not the 14th (haha)
36) Walking the trails at Sands Point
37) Uncle Louie G's Ices!
38) Labor Day Party at T-Unit's
39) Moving Day
40) Singing "Sweet Caroline" to the LB cops
41) TV Show Theme Song Night
42) Democrats sweep election day
43) Softball at Jones Beach
44) The Disco Outfit
45) "Front Row" at Yankee Stadium
46) Cooking Day with Tiny A (Gnocci (her) and Eggplant (me))
47) Drunk Dennis across the street
48) Churchill's on a special playoff football Sunday in January
49) The "Beach Necklace" found at fashion stores
50) Pushing Christina's Car to work on a 90 degree day
51) The "Kool Aid Car"
52) The "After Happy Hour" party at club 69
53) Beer Pong
54) The Thusday Night after work party at club 69 in August
55) Peppermint Hot Chocolate with Tiny A
56) Beer Olympics
57) "Snap Yo' Fingers"
58) Linda and Liz
59) Insane gas prices
60) "Otto"
61) "Lucky Louie" on HBO
62) "If you like my meatballs, you'll love my sausage" great shirt Sugar V
63) Dogsitting
64) Deal, or No Deal???
65) Booing A-Rod
66) Movie Night at work
67) Strawberry Fields
68) "You're Makin' Me Craaaazy" (song sticks in my head)
69) "Crime Scene" Night with Caren
70) Kerry's Birthday Party at The Inn
71) Ghetto rigged air conditioner
72) Pumpkin pies
73) Ballybannon
74) One minute walks to the beach
75) The white pig chalkboard
76) Pettitte coming back to NY
77) Sinatra, a fireplace, and a dance
78) Superbowl Sunday with Amester and Brucey
79) Dublin Mudslide and Black N Tan Ice Cream
80) Singing to the trucking company at work
81) Greg's Wall of Quotes
82) Meeting Sugar V's rat in Park Slope
83) A Faulty Gas Burner
84) The front room
85) Saving the parking spot!
86) Bad cell phone reception
87) Matisyahu
88) Greg's Laugh at lunchtime
89) My family moving
90) The 1:07am train
91) 20+ Police visits to club 69
92) Jackass 2
93) Flintstoning Linda's Car
94) Caveman chats with Sugar V
95) Running the boardwalk
96) Falling head first into Sugar V's bathtub
97) Jeter being robbed of the MVP award
98) Doug K and I working together again
99) Talking to my sister again
100) Wishing and hoping 2007 is my best year yet!

Johnny Come Out To Play...In Your Empty Garden

  

What happened here, as the New York sunset disappeared? I found an empty garden among the flagstones there. Who lived here? He must have been a gardener that cared a
lot, who weeded out the tears and grew a good crop...and now it all looks strange.


Today the Grammy nominations were announced. Big deal. The state of the music industry is a complete joke. Fly by night artists, with fly by night cd's who won't be remembered five months from now, let alone five years from now. It makes a day to remember John Lennon, on this twenty-sixth anniversary of his murder, even that much more special.

I grew up brainwashed by the media, and even by my Dad, in thinking Elvis was "The King." I completely disagree with that "logic." We have a bunch of Elvises walking around the music industry today...pretty boys, with pretty hair, who are handed pretty songs to sing. Commercialized crap, if you ask me. The Beatles, now they were the "kings." They were the innovaters. They took music to a whole different level, and rock and roll was forever changed.

So tonight, as I sit in my room, sipping red wine, listening to John Lennon, remembering how truly great he was, I am so appreciative of what he gave us. What he left behind for generations to come.

Rather than leave you all with a classic from John or the Beatles, I want to leave you with a song that George Harrison wrote about his friend John shortly after his death. It is called "All Those Years Ago." If you know the song, you'll appreciate the words and probably sing along. If you don't know it, really listen to what George says about John, in this fantastic tribute to a great artist. I will be at Strawberry Fields tonight, braving wind chills in the teens to pay my respects and remember one of the best of all time.

"Band On The Run"

  

Those of you who know me well, know that I could talk music for days on end. I love the stories behind albums, songs, and musical artists. In the spirit of The Beatles and of the anniversary of John Lennon's death this coming Friday, I am in a musical mood. I heard today that "Band on the Run" the solo album by Paul McCartney was released on this day in 1973. Although I was a baby, I can honestly remember hearing these songs when I was a toddler. The album really took off in the summer of '74, when I was three, so I guess it is possible to remember back that far.

What is so amazing about this album? The events leading up to it's release. In September of '73 Paul decided to take the band to civil war torn Nigeria to record the album. Paul, his wife Linda, and the other band members arrived in Lagos Nigeria to record the album. Right before its production, two band members walked out in fear of their lives. Paul, Linda, and one band member carried on despite the turmoil. After the demo tapes were done, Paul and the band were robbed by armed bandits who stole their demo tapes, cameras, wallets, jewelry, etc.

So what did Paul do? The genius that he is, said no problem, and remembered everything he recorded in his head. He then went on to record the album all over again in a decaying studio. Despite these hardships, perhaps because of them, Band on the Run remains the most focused and consistently satisfying record of McCartney's post-Beatles career. So in the spirit of Paul, and December 5th, 1973, its release date, let's all watch "Band On the Run."

It's The Time Of the Season

  

Four Saturday Nights in a row in NYC. That is a record for me. I've been enjoying the weekly journey into the Big Apple. Last night, we took in some touristy sites.

After another great dinner in Little Italy, CW and I hopped in a cab and headed up to 50th and 5th. We strolled over to Rockefeller Center to see the tree, take some pictures, and enjoy the scenery. Sugar V and the Mrs. joined us later on, as they caught a later train into the city.

This Friday, the 8th, is a night I have been looking forward to all year. Each year, fans mark the anniversary of John Lennon's death with a vigil in Central Park's Strawberry Fields. People gather, light candles, sing songs, and remember one of the greatest musicians ever. This year the somber anniversary falls on a Friday Night. I will be in the park this Friday Night taking part. CW has her company party and Sugar V and the Mrs. will be there as well, so I need to go with a friend that appreciates John and his music as much as I do. I will have a nice Lennon post on Friday to mark the occasion.

This upcoming Saturday, the four of us will be heading into the city for brunch and some ice skating in the park. I love ice skating in the park, more so than in Rockefeller Center. There is something about the atmosphere in the park that I love. A rink, surrounded by thousands of trees, in the middle of a city.....breathtaking.

My parents and brother are settling in nicely in the "Tar Heel" State. I spoke to them about an hour ago. They are getting settled, putting together new furniture and unpacking. I am glad they all made it down safely.

So, today, I am trying to get myself motivated to hang Christmas lights, put up a tree, and get in the spirit a bit. It's tough this year though. Hopefully, I will muster up the energy to do it. I am in a cooking mood as well, but I don't think I will do both......

I am reflective today for some reason. It's been an interesting year to say the least. Last night on the train, I was thinking out loud to Sugar V and questioning life and looking for answers as to how we end up on totally different paths in life than we ever imagined. Where I am at the end of 2006 is so different from where I was at the beginning of the year......strange days indeed.

Well, I am off to try to accomplish something today. Getting home at 2:15am, not sleeping until 5am, and waking up at 9 to crying dogs who wanted to go outside really does not spark motivation, but I vow to make it happen today. Have a great start to your week!

Here's A Tip............

  

Have you noticed lately that you can't back out of your driveway without having to tip someone? Everywhere you go now, whether it be for a morning coffee, an afternoon snack, a dry cleaner, or an ice cream there is a tip jar staring you in the face. I am sympathetic that the minimum wage has not been raised in a decade, but enough is enough!

You put a jelly doughnut in a bag and handed it to me......should I sign over my paycheck? I just don't understand why people feel they should be rewarded for doing their jobs.

Perhaps it is just a NY thing, but the garbage men here won't go out of the way to take bulk items, even on the designated day that you are supposed to put out those items, without offering up a bribe. They seriously will leave an old mattress, an old couch, etc., curbside unless you are waving money when they arrive. I even remember when I was a kid, my grandfather making friends with the garbage men by bringing them tips, cases of beer, cold drinks in the summer etc. After all those nice gestures, my grandfather could have put a body out on the curb and they would have taken it with no questions asked!

Tipping has become so frequent, I am not even sure who is REALLY supposed to get a tip anymore. The cable guy comes to install a cable box...tip or no tip? Or does a cold soda suffice? Does the person have to break a sweat to warrant a tip? What are the tipping guidelines? All I know is that I am all tipped out.....

I am going to try a tip cup on my desk tomorrow and see how that flies.

Totally Random

  

Monday Night....relaxing and watching The Tube Music Network. I love this channel. 24 hours of music videos, barely any commercials, and 100% rock. Don't get me wrong, I love rap and R&B, but it is nice to get away from it and watch all rock n' roll once in a while.

Wow, I can't believe Thanksgiving is over! I also can't believe it has been a week since I last wrote....I am slacking. Actually I've been busy!

I took off from work last Wednesday to get the house ready for Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving turned out to be pretty good. The food was good, the time with the family and friends was great as well.

I had a pretty good weekend. I have been waiting to see that new movie "Bobby" about RFK. It was a really great movie. Being that RFK is one of my "idols" it made the movie that much better. Caren and I saw it on Sunday night after a quick bite to eat.

Saturday Night Caren and I ventured into NYC yet again. It's getting to be a Saturday Night tradition for us. This time we hit Little Italy and had some amazing Italian cuisine at the world famous Vincent's. The food was great. We sipped wine, chatted, and ate our amazing "medium" sauce with the meatballs the size of oranges.

We then got ambitious and walked all the way from Little Italy to Times Square. Quite a walk, but it was a gorgeous night and we enjoyed taking in all the sights and sounds of NYC. I tried a pumpkin spice latte at Starbucks because they were out of peppermint for the peppermint hot chocolate that I love. It was quite good! Even though I had to transfer at Jamaica for the connection back home to Long Beach, I am glad Caren and I got 20 minutes on the same train before I had to switch.......the holiday feel is definitely in the air in NYC.

So on to random shit. Is anyone else hooked on this "Deal Or No Deal" TV show? I am not a huge TV watcher....I seriously couldn't name 5 shows on TV, but this Deal or no Deal has me watching all the time. Some dude gambled $219,000 tonight and went home with $10. What an idiot. He was from Arkansas, so that explains a lot.....

So, we are doing this Secret Santa at work. Yet, everyone is telling everyone who they have to buy for. Not so secret I suppose. I actually drew the name of a person I actually like....so buying a gift won't be painful. I was dreading buying for someone I hate. Thoughts of wrapping Bruce's poop crossed my mind several times before I finally pulled the name of someone I liked out of the hat. Think I wouldn't have done it? Well then you don't know some of the assholes I work with.......

So being that my family is off in NC....and I don't quite have a family of my own just yet, I am seriously thinking of heading into NYC on Christmas to volunteer at a soup kitchen or something like that. I think it would be amazing to help others in need, especially on Christmas.

I've been asked to go to two holiday parties with female friends as their "dates" this year. I don't even want to go to my own company holiday party, let alone two other parties....so I have to come up with some excuses.....any ideas? hahaha Come on, be a sport!

Ok, I am tired and need rest. I hope this post finds you all well and that your Thanksgiving/weekend was great!

Thanksgiving Is Approaching....

All the Best 

With all of the Thanksgiving preparation I have to do over the next two days, I thought I would post my Thanksgiving blog today. I want to start by wishing all of you a wonderful holiday. I hope you have an amazing holiday and weekend.

I will be hosting about 8-10 people at my house which include friends and family. It should be a fun day. I love cooking and hosting, so it will be a lot of fun. The wine will help too. :)

Anyway, in the spirit of the holiday, I am going to post my 2006 "Things I am Thankful For" list. No, not 2006 things, for the year 2006 silly. I can't believe it is Thanksgiving already...this is nuts.....

Things I am thankful for in 2006:

My family. Although crazy (what family isn't) they have always been in my corner. I will miss them when they move next week.

My friends, especially Sugar V. He is one of a kind and a genuine guy. I hope our friendship carries on for years. He looooves Thanksgiving sausage.

Meeting Caren. I hope great things come of it. I am looking forward to baseball season with her, among other things. Our NYC visits, pizza nights, impromptu dancing, chats, and laughs have put a smile on my face.

Bruce! The best dog in the world! I am thankful each day for him, even when he is a butthead.

You crazy folks who actually still read this blog! Thanks for sharing your comments with me and taking the time out to visit.

America waking up, finally. Election day gave me hope...that its citizens aren't as stupid as I once thought. Let's get our men and women home...safe.....it is long overdue.

A memorable summer of 2006. Although it had its tough moments, I grew as a person this summer. I will never forget it.

The time I spent with Amester. Thanks for all the kindness and memories. We had a lot of fun and laughs. 2006 would not have been nearly the same without you.

Have an amazing holiday everyone!

Winds of Change

  

As I sit here on this stormy Thursday Night, I reflect. The winds are howling outside my window. The weather report said today could have been the last warm day of the year, and that the winds of change are blowing through tonight.

2006 has been a transitional year for me. The winds of change have blown often throughout this year.

Let's reflect:

In January, right after the new year, I started a new job. I am still there, the job has had its good and bad moments. Mainly stressful moments. I have grown quite a bit there and taken on so much responsibility.

Around the same time I started the new job, I met Tiny A. We had a great 7 months or so together. She was very influential in my life and she is missed daily. Whether or not our split was for the better or not, is still to be determined I suppose.

In May, I moved out of the house I had spent the last two years in. It was a good move for me. In many ways I felt like I got my independence back.

I moved into a new house in a different part of town in May. I made so many new friends and met so many new people in the neighborhood. I have mixed feelings about my future in the house come this May when the lease is up for renewal, what will happen is still to be determined.

In between all this, my family is moving to NC. My brother is already gone and my parents will be leaving in a couple of weeks. It is going to be strange, as I have said before.

I met Caren in September. She is definitely one of a kind. I've been so consumed with life/work the past few weeks, I really haven't been able to spend the time with her that I really would like to. I hope that changes over the next few weeks because I really want to see where it goes.......

My "constants" in 2006 have been my close friends. Sugar V is always there no matter what drama, craziness, or chicanery is going on in life. Christina gets me through the work days with some sanity still left.

Brucey boy brings me happiness every day. He is the greatest dog ever.

I sense even bigger change for 2007 for myself. I want to start taking some chances in life. I feel I have played life safe for too long. I have some dreams I want to follow. I want to be involved with more things that I am passionate about. I have plans and ideas to make that happen.

Although "Bored at the Beach" will be around for the long haul, I have an idea for another blog that I will keep secret, just for me. I need a space to vent without friends, family, and people I know tapping in. I plan on giving that a lot of attention come the new year. I am excited about what the wind will blow my way in the months ahead.....

So...the perfect song for the Friday Video, is "Wind of Change" by the Scorpions. Have a great weekend!

More Than A Feeling

Ok, before I get into the real post, just a few random thoughts.

You know what bothers the shit out of me? When someone leaves you a voicemail or a text saying something like "I have to talk to you about 'something'" or "we need to talk about something." I mean just say what the hell it is and spare the person on the listening end the stress of wondering what the hell you need to "talk" about.

Because you know that when someone "needs to talk" to you, it is never good. Right?

Anyway, I have not been blogging much. Unfortunately, work has consumed my life, for the most part, over the last 4-6 weeks. For those of you I have neglected, nothing personal. Although I have been called out on it by a couple of people. Sometimes life just happens and you get consumed.

So, my brother moved last week, my parents are ready to go shortly after Thanksgiving. I guess that is kind of depressing. Don't get me wrong, I am happy for them and I know life will be easier for them down in NC, but it is just going to be strange.

Anyway, on with the blog. I've been watching a lot of old school MTV videos on YOUTUBE recently. It surely is a trip down memory lane. I was browsing VH1 Classic the other night and they had a show about albums. The question posed to everyone on the show was "What one album should EVERY music fan have in their collection?" This made me think. There have been hundreds of amazing albums over the last 40+ years. So many stand out in my mind. But I was able to pick one. If you DON'T own it, run out this weekend and buy it. I chose Boston's debut album BOSTON. This album came out when albums were really "albums". When the cover art was amazing and every song was mind blowing. I don't think the youngsters of today appreciate what an "album" really is. Now we download individual songs, and don't really appreciate the artists for all of their work rather than for just a hit song.

  

Boston's album came out when I was about six years old and it takes me back to my childhood years when my mom would play this album over and over again. But, I chose it not so much for the nostalgia, but for the lyrical, vocal, and musical quality this albums contains. The album gets better with each song and really stays with you.

I'll leave you with a great track from the album.....have a great day!

Just Like......Starting Over

For a few months, back in late 2005 and early 2006, I featured a "Friday Video" here at the beach. I thought I would "start over" with that today. This time around I will elaborate a bit on each song rather than just post the video.

This week, I chose "(Just Like) Starting Over" by John Lennon. Back in 1975 John took a bit of a musical layoff. He spent his time at home baking bread and raising his son Sean. Many said he had a creative block....

Five years later in June of 1980, the songs started to flow when John was on holiday with with Yoko and Sean. He captured his love for Yoko with the writing of "Woman" which I personally think is one of the most amazing love songs ever written. He also wrote a lullaby for Sean called "Beautiful Boy." Its message was that life is what happens while you are making other plans. So true.

John and Yoko started recording these new songs in August of 1980. The "Double Fantasy" album was soon complete. The first single released was "(Just Like) Starting Over" which was a story of a second honeymoon and a start of a new life. The single hit #6 on the U.S. billboard charts and was climbing in December of 1980. On December 8th, John was shot and killed outsid ehis apartment building in NYC.

The title was grimly ironic.....but I suppose that often happens. The song always reminds me of that time period. I can remember this song being played all over the airwaves right after his death. The ringing bell at the beginning of the song, the 1950's style of rock, the amazing vocals, and the song's message make this a true masterpiece.

I'm Not Stupid.......

  

George Bush, Dick Cheney, and Don Rumsfeld think you're stupid. Yes, they do.

They think they can take a mangled joke about President Bush and Iraq by John Kerry....a man who is not even running for office but who, unlike Mr. Bush and Mr. Cheney, never ran away from combat service....and get you to vote against all Democrats in this election.

Every time you hear Mr. Bush or Mr. Cheney lash out against Mr. Kerry, I hope you will say to yourself, "They must think I'm stupid." Because they surely do.

They think that they can get you to overlook all of the Bush team's real and deadly insults to the U.S. military over the past six years by hyping and exaggerating Mr. Kerry's mangled gibe at the president.

What could possibly be more injurious and insulting to the U.S. military than to send it into combat in Iraq without enough men.....to launch an invasion of a foreign country not by the Powell Doctrine of overwhelming force, but by the Rumsfeld Doctrine of just enough troops to lose? What could be a bigger insult than that?

What could possibly be more injurious and insulting to our men and women in uniform than sending them off to war without the proper equipment, so that some soldiers in the field were left to buy their own body armor and to retrofit their own jeeps with scrap metal so that roadside bombs in Iraq would only maim them for life and not kill them? And what could be more injurious and insulting than Don Rumsfeld's response to criticism that he sent our troops off in haste and unprepared: Hey, you go to war with the army you've got -- get over it.

What could possibly be more injurious and insulting to our men and women in uniform than to send them off to war in Iraq without any coherent postwar plan for political reconstruction there, so that the U.S. military has had to assume not only security responsibilities for all of Iraq but the political rebuilding as well? This administration never had a plan for the morning after, and we've been making it up.....and paying the price....ever since.

And what could possibly be more injurious and insulting to our men and women in Iraq than to send them off to war and then go out and finance the very people they're fighting against with our gluttonous consumption of oil? Sure, George Bush told us we're addicted to oil, but he has not done one single significant thing -- demanded higher mileage standards from Detroit, imposed a gasoline tax or even used the bully pulpit of the White House to drive conservation -- to end that addiction. So we continue to finance the U.S. military with our tax dollars, while we finance Iran, Syria, and the rest of our "enemies" with our energy purchases.

Everyone says that Karl Rove is a genius. Yeah, right. So are cigarette companies. They get you to buy cigarettes even though we know they cause cancer. That is the kind of genius Karl Rove is. He is not a man who has designed a strategy to reunite our country around an agenda of renewal for the 21st century.....to bring out the best in us. His "genius" is taking some irrelevant joke by John Kerry and twisting it to bring out the worst in us, so you will ignore the mess that the Bush team has brought upon this country.

And Karl Rove has succeeded at that in the past because he was sure that he could sell just enough Bush cigarettes, even though people knew they caused cancer. Please, please, for our country's health, prove him wrong this time.

Let Karl know that you're not stupid. Let him know that you know that the most patriotic thing to do in this election is to vote against an administration that has, through sheer incompetence, brought us to a point in Iraq that was not inevitable but is now unwinnable.

Let Karl know that you think this is a critical election, because you know as a citizen that if the Bush team can behave with the level of deadly incompetence it has exhibited in Iraq -- and then get away with it by holding on to the House and the Senate -- it means our country has become a banana republic. It means our democracy is in tatters because it is so gerrymandered, so polluted by money, and so divided by professional political hacks that we can no longer hold the ruling party to account.

It means we're as stupid as Karl thinks we are.

I, for one, don't think we're that stupid. Today, we'll see.

Let's hope this is the Republican theme song today:

Sick Call

"I NO COME WORK TODAY!!!"

Hung Chow calls into work and says, "Hey, I no come work today, I really
sick. Got headache, stomach ache and legs hurt, I no come work."

The boss says, "You know something, Hung Chow, I really need you today.
When I feel like this, I go to my wife and tell her to give me sex. That
makes everything better and I go to work. You try that."

Two hours later Hung Chow calls again. "I do what you say and I feel
great. I be at work soon....... You got nice house."

BOO!

  

When you REALLY think about it, Halloween is child abuse. One day every year we send kids out into the night to talk to strangers. Then when they get to the homes of these strangers, they accept candy from them. Then when they get home with all their treats, we throw away the one healthy snack, the apple, because it may have a razor blade in it and encourage the kids to eat all the sugar......

Candy corn? What is this crap? Why do we call it a "treat" if everyone hates it? We got rid of the Tony Danza show, yet we can't get rid of candy corn. Anyone who hands this shit out to kids today really wants them to die, but they just don't have the guts to stick the razor blade in that healthy apple.

If you forgot to buy Halloween candy, just say so. Don't hand out random crap from your kitchen. Last year, there was a guy on Sugar V's block who was handing out batteries and mini-packets of soy sauce. Sugar V got so pissed, he poked him in the eye with his fairy wand.

Women must admit that Halloween is just an excuse to dress like a whore. Ladies, nurses don't wear fishnet stockings. Kittens don't own pushup bras. Real French maids don't shave their underarms. Now — now, don't get me wrong, I'm all for women getting in touch with their "inner slut," but, 'fess up, Halloween has become less about candy and more about the "Haunted Ho's."

Banks must stop putting up Halloween decorations and open up another teller window. You're a bank, not a college dorm room. Your service charges are scary enough.

Have a great day!!!!!

Monday Mix......

Did this weekend fly by or is it just me? Ok, it did fly by even with the additional hour.

The night we turn our clocks back could be my least favorite day/night of the year. I despise leaving for work in the dark and coming home in darkness.......Where oh where did summer go?

I bought all my Halloween candy today. I packaged it all in cute little treat bags for all the little fuckers that will be trick or treating in my 'hood. When they say "trick or treat" I should just juggle or do a quick trick, eat my own candy as a reward and slam the door on the fuckos.......but seriously, the bags are great and the kids should love them.

Bruce got his Halloween costume today. I bought him a "pimp dog" costume. I have attached some pictures below. More to come on Halloween. He is so pudgy, he can barely fit in the large costume......

I got a "shower radio" a few weeks ago and I am loving it. This morning I busted out the acoustic version of "Livin' On A Prayer" by Bon Jovi and boy did I sound just like him......I love music in the shower....I got some good moves and vocals in there. I should start the shower singing tour...coming to a tub near you.

This weekend was ok. Friday Night Caren came by. We wound up having many cocktails, listening to music, and ordering some food. I really enjoy her company. Can't wait to see her again soon....

The rest of the weekend was "blah." The weather was horrible on Saturday. Downpours and 50MPH winds made for a shitty day. The wind carried over all day Sunday. I woke up Sunday Morning to Bruce and Sampson eating out of the garbage pail outside which tipped over during the night. Their paws and noses were covered in tomato sauce from the food tins from Friday Night and garbage was all over the yard. I looked hot (sarcasm) in a t-shirt, shorts, black dress socks, and flip flops cleaning it up at 7am. Thank God nobody saw me.

My brother leaves for NC on Wednesday. It is going to be weird having him live down there. My parents leave the week after Turkey Day. I am hoping he comes up for the weekend and we all have one last big holiday here in NY. I am hoping to host Thanksgiving again this year. Christmas will truly be strange without them here. I will do my best to make the Christmas holiday my own this year.......

I often think of leaving NY, but the more I think about it, the more I realize how New York I really am. I don't think I could do it. I have such a pride for this place. In my eyes, it is the greatest city in the world.....

St. Louis Cardinals, World Champions? What next an asteroid wiping out the earth? Talk about a shitty team winning the championship. WTF is going on? All we need is the Minnesota Timberwolves winning the NBA championship, an Atlanta Thrashers Stanley Cup team, and a Phoenix Cardinals Superbowl win.......and this wacky year will be complete......

Ok, here is a sneak peek at Bruce's costume. Have a great start to the week.....

  

  

So Many Drugs, So Few "Conditions"

  

Drug companies have to stop making up diseases! I don't know what "the terrorists" are planning next for America, but if I had every problem they talk about in medicine commercials: breathing, lifting, walking, sitting, sleeping, crapping, not crapping, getting a boner and male menopause, I would welcome death. Bring it on! Deadly nerve gas? Please, I've got seasonal allergies!

I mean, it seems like every time I turn on the TV these days, I see some ad for some drug I never heard of, to treat some disease I've never heard of. That's not a stomach ache you have from eating the seventy-five buffalo wings on 10 cent wing night, it's Irritable Bowel Syndrome. Or I.B.S. Or as I call it, "B.S." Which would also apply to the dreaded "Social Anxiety Disorder." Or as they used to call it, "shyness." We treated it with an old home recipe: a bottle of vodka and a hooker.

Your wife doesn't get turned on? Well, it couldn't be because you're a 350 pound snowman-shaped sausage casing, so full of beer you sweat hops. It's because she has "Female Sexual Dysfunction."

Your husband doesn't get turned on? Well, it couldn't be the 5,000 calorie a day diet you are on and the three chins you have...it is because he has "Erectile Dysfunction."

And before they came up with "Restless Leg Syndrome," did that even exist? Did you ever hear someone say, "Sorry I couldn't make the party, Charlie....the old restless leg was acting up." You know, next time you have an uncontrollable urge to move your feet, maybe you should just...move your feet! Your feet are trying to tell you the same thing your dog is trying to tell you when he's been cooped up in the house all day: "I want to go for a fucking walk!"

But be careful. There's a Tasmanian Devil living under your toenail. He lives way way below the nail's surface.......

I am waiting for the ad that tells me that my morning hard-on is actually "Hard Dick Syndrome." Or H.D.S...and there's a cartoon bunny who says, "Are you bothered by morning stiffness? Try Flaccidix. Flaccidix is specially formulated to make your penis soft and more manageable. Ridiculous......

Drug companies are the dealers, and Congress and the FDA are the cop on the beat who's been paid off to look the other way. New drugs used to have to go through a rigorous process of testing. Now they just give it to Courtney Love or Robert Downey Jr, and if they live....it's approved.

Only In New York

I was born and raised here in New York. So, with that being said, it takes a lot for me to be shocked or surprised by the behavior of someone in public. On Sunday, I sat in Central Park with Caren in "Strawberry Fields" and we people watched and were greatly entertained.

Our day started about noon when we met up in Penn Station. We hopped in a taxi and headed to my favorite part of the city, the west side along Central Park. We had brunch at a really great place named Isabella's on W 77th. We had a few mimosas while we waited for a table and chatted for a bit. After about 20 minutes, we were seated at a great table right by the windows where we chatted, people watched, and enjoyed a great brunch. Sugar V and his wife called us during brunch and said they were on their way to the city....

After we ate, Caren and I strolled a few blocks to W 72nd where the John Lennon memorial "Strawberry Fields" is located. It's a mosaic tile which reads "Imagine" which is down a wooded path about 100 yards from the street. We sat on one of the dozens of park benches around the memorial and just took in the sights and sounds...and boy were there plenty.

Our attention was immediately drawn to Gary (picture below). Gary is quite a colorful character. Gary "works" at the memorial. Each day he does something different to decorate the "Imagine" tiles. Sunday, he had flower petals around the exhibit in the shape of a peace sign, It was nicely done. Gary was very drunk on red wine he was "secretly" drinking out of a clear Sprite bottle. Gary would give the same speech every 5 minutes for the two hours we were there. He would say, "Welcome to New York, welcome to the jungle, welcome to Strawberry Fields, I've been coming here for 13 years, been here everyday for the last four, enjoy folks, peace." Then he'd yeall "Where's everyone from?????!!!!!!!" Some people would answer, some would run.....Gary was a riot. Caren and I couldn't stop watching him and his antics. Gary had a miniature guitar near the exhibit for "donations." I thought perhaps the money people tossed in the guitar was to purchase flower petals and items to decorate the exhibit......we found out quickly it was Gary's booze money, as he paid someone withmoney from that guitar for a bottle of red wine they brought him. He carefully poured the red wine into Sprite bottles for "discreet" consumption.

We kept each other warm on the park bench, it was brisk and somewhat chilly on Sunday. While relaxing we noticed another colorful character. This dude (pictured below) had a bag of "sporting goods" that he was trying to sell some folks, including Gary. He was saying how great the stuff he had was, that is was "vintage." It was then that the ball dude, walks like 10 feet from the people he was trying to sell this vintage "memorabilia" to, and started signing the stuff himself......great vintage stuff indeed. The pic below shows our pal signing the stuff with God knows what star's name on it........

As Gary stumbled and played air guitar to the music blaring out of his 1983 boombox, Sugar V called and said he would be to the park in a few. It was then that Gary yelled. "GO AHEAD, KISS YOUR HUSBAND!!!!!!" So Caren and I look over and he was gesturing to Caren. Apparently Caren and I had been recently married in a drunken stuper last Saturday Night in between the pizza and "club 69." So we amused him with a kiss.....

Moments later we see Sugar V and Nebraska girl heading deep into the park, apparently Sugar V wanted to head into the woods to make a move on wifey, or to expose himself to some boy scouts. We called him and told him he was going the wrong way........he then got on the right path and met us with all of our new colorful friends.....

After 20 minutes or so, we walked out of the park, towards Columbus Circle (pic below). We went to Columbus Mall and browsed the shops. After a while we decided to go have dinner. We headed towards 9th Ave where here are hundreds of great restaurants. Why we chose "Ralph's Italian Restaurant" or whatever the dude's name was is beyond me......

We walk in and get seated, the lighting was so poor, I needed a flashlight to read the menu. They were one Mexican short of a Mariachi Band in that fine Italian establishment. The food was awful. I think Chef Boyardee makes better sauce.....we high tailed it out of there quicly. Sugar V and I were still so hungry, we stopped at "Grey's Papaya" for one of NYC's finest and most famous hot dogs.....as we strolled back to Penn to catch our trains.....

It was a quick "goodnight" as my train was ready to leave....I had wished it was a Saturday Night so I could have lured Caren back to "the beach." Sugar V, Nebraska Girl, and I boarded the Long Beach Train and continued our insanity......

I decided I was going to make loud growling sounds every 3-5 minutes the whole ride home on the train. This annoyed many people, but intrigued quite a few. We called Caren on her train to get her to hear the craziness we were causing. Mrs. Sugar V was laughing so hard, I thought she would pee her pants......

It was another great time with Caren and the Sugars. I've really gotten to know Caren a bit more the last week or so and she is just great. It's nice to be "in like" again. (is that a term???) I like that I can be myself around her and around Sugar V and Nebraska girl. I am very at ease with all of them. The last two weekends have been so much fun........

So, here are three pics from Sunday......

  

Columbus Circle. Sugar V kept having to say "Hey, is that Columbus???" Referring to the large statue of the famous explorer.....

  

Get your Holiday orders in now...sports memorabilia man has all your favorite sports stars' autographs in stock!!!!!

  

And last but not least...our boy Gary........taking care of Strawberry Fields and keeping things in order down on W 72nd.....

Oh What A Night.....

  

Saturday Night was a night I was looking forward to all week. Sugar V, his wife Nebraska Girl, Caren, Christina, and Joe all came over for homemade pizza night.

I prepared all day cleaning and shopping. I was in charge of all the appetizers. I prepared some great stuff like artichoke hearts, prosciutto, grapes, cheeses, olives, bruchetta, and other odds and ends. Sugar V and Nebraska Girl brought the homemade dough to make the pizza.

Sugar V and wifey arrived about 5. We proceeded to start the sauce and get the appetizers ready for the table. Caren arrived a little while later with treats for my pup and Sugar V's favorite...CANNOLIS! We all had wine and waited for Christina and Joe to arrive.

When Christina and Joe arrived, we sat in my favorite room in the house, the front sun room where we ate, laughed, and listened to music..... not to mention drank wine, LOTS of wine. Earlier that day, I bought 7 bottles...and Joe brought 6 with him...so needless to say we were stocked.

Two hours flew by and we were all tipsy from the wine. Caren and I stayed behind and chatted while the other four went into the kitchen to start the pizzas. I had only seen Caren that one time weeks ago in NYC, so I thought it was a good time to get acquainted...and besides...I did not want to see what four semi-drunk friends were going to do to my kitchen.

While they got the pizzas rolling, I turned on some Italian music to set the mood as the wine kept flowing. There was singing, dancing, flour throwing, and a host of things going on. We thought it would be nice to invite my neighbor Mario, the 76 year old guy from Italy who lives across the street. So Caren and I staggered across the street to get him to come over. He walked across and had so much fun with us.

The pizza was absolutely amazing. Sugar V and the crew did a kick ass job. We then got "club 69" going with disco music, disco lights, and lots of dancing. I even busted out my disco outfit I bought for my block party a couple of months ago...it was a crazy night.

In total, we consumed 12.5 bottles of wine, 8 pizzas, a few trays of appetizers....and lots of cannoli and cannoli cake that Christina had custom made with the name "Sugar V" written across it.

It was great having my closest friends over and it was great talking with Caren all night. My kitchen looked like a crime scene the next morning when I woke up to the two dogs barking on 2 hours sleep, a hangover, and a headache. But, it was worth it. Three hours later, I had a spotless house, a shower, and a full day to sleep......

Why can I drink vodka all night and never get drunk, but I get tipsy from wine so quickly? It is a mystery to me......

This weekend the six of us may be doing the pumpkin picking, wine tasting (oh no, not more wine), and the whole Eastern Long Island autumn experience......I can't wait.

For More On This Story.....

  

Log on to our web site at www.____________. What the fuck is that all about? Don't you hate when you sit through an entire show and get really involved in it, then they wrap it up poorly and say "For more on this story, log onto our website." Why fucko? I am here, just fuckin' tell me now!!! Very frustrating.

Anyway today was John Lennon's birthday. He would have been 66. Somehow I can't picture John as a senior citizen. Just like I can't picture JFK, Marilyn Monroe, Jim Morrison, or James Dean with grey hair. It's weird how these people stay forever young in our minds. I enjoyed the usual noon "Beatles Block" on Q104.3 Today they played all solo John. I cranked it up on my lunch break. I was pounding the steering wheel singing "Give Peace a Chance."

This past Saturday was "Irish Day" here in Long Beach. Each year on the 1st Saturday of the month, the west end shuts down for a parade and a "festival." Basically it is just thousands of drunken people staggering around the neighborhood. Although hearing bagpipes to start the day never hurt anyone....right?

Saturday was a celebration of my Irish side....today, although I worked, was a celebration of my Italian side. I took a ride to an amazing italian store for lunch. I got the best sandwich. Prosciutto, Salami, Roasted red peppers, and fresh mozzarella on semolina bread. I couldn't help but wash it down with a liter of Pellegrino sparkling water.

It's a great fall evening here in Long Beach. My run was great and the view outside right now is even better..although the dogs rolling around and nipping at each other somehow takes away from the tranquility.

Hope you all had a fun weekend! :)

FOLLOW ME!!!!!!

For the best Corned Beef Sandwich in town.

There is a Kosher Deli in town that has a fleet of vans that read "FOLLOW ME FOR THE BEST CORNED BEEF SANDWICH IN TOWN" on the back door of each vehicle.

Friday Night T-Unit and I went to dinner and had a couple of drinks. On the way back to my house we spotted one of the Kosher Deli vans in front of us. I said to T-Unit. "Let's follow him and see what happens." T-Unit thought I was nuts, but we followed the deli van.

Everytime the van would stop at a home for a delivery we would just pull up behind it and watch. The deli dude started to become paranoid after about 30 minutes and 5 stops. Finally, after 45 minutes, the deli guy jerks the van to the side of the road and gets out. He was a heavyset Jewish guy complete with a "YARMULKE" on his head. (That's actually how it is spelled)

He says to us "Why are you following me????????!!!!!!"
I say "I want the best corned beef sandwich in town"
He storms away, slams his van door and peels out with the van.

We laughed the rest of the night.

That Autumn Feel

  

Sure I am still in denial that summer is over. I still have all the windows open, my bedroom air conditioner runs all night, I still run in shorts, wear polo shirts to work, and refuse to put the beach gear away. But lately, autumn is in the air.

I had my first slice of pumpkin pie last night. That flavor IS autumn. Just the smell of pumpkin pie makes me think of fall. I went out and bought a bunch of pumpkin pie scented candles and lit them all over the house tonight. The crisp breeze is blowing, playoff baseball is on TV, all I need is "Moondance" on the stereo to make this fall night complete.

The leaves don't start turning real color for another week or so here on Long Island. They don't reach their peak color until the last week of the month. I can't wait for the Sunday drives out to the vineyards, the farm stands, the pumpkin patches and the fall foliage.

Anyway, I've been so busy, sorry I haven't checked in. Lots of social activities going on. I need to get back in the blogging swing of things.........

Hope you all have a great weekend. I have some good stuff planned.....should be fun. Go Yankees!

The Time Has Come

  

Well here we are, October. Crisp autumn breezes, 7pm sunsets, falling leaves, air conditioners taken out of the windows, and playoff baseball. The playoffs start today and I am so ready!

The front windows of my home are complete with NY Yankees decor. You can feel the spirit of the playoffs throughout the neighborhood. Although there are quite a few METS fans on the block as well.

Around the corner, there is a deli that I stop by often. The staff in there are obsessed Mets fans who all wear Mets gear, have Mets games 24/7 on the TV's, and pictures of the Mets all over. Needless to say, I get teased a lot when I go in sporting my Yankees cap.

Lately, there has been an old drunk man with his wife and dog that hang out at the front door of the deli each night in their Mets gear. The old dude has been heckling me and crazy for the last week. Tonight was the first night in a while that i was able to go in for my snack without being harrassed, because according to the deli clerk..."You just missed him!!!" Wheeeeeeeew.

April seems like an eternity ago for me. I moved in May, had a long and crazy summer, said goodbye to some, and hello to some new people.....but the constant has been my Yankees. They are always there for me.

Tonight I have early dinner plans, then I am going to run home like a boy to see the first pitch. For those of you who have a passion for our national pastime, you understand what the next few weeks mean when your team is in the playoffs. When you are a Yankee fan, a Yankee player, or the Yankees owner, just making it isn't enough. Anything short of a championship is a failure.

Cahoots?

  

ca·hoots (kə-hūts')
pl.n. Informal.
Questionable collaboration; secret partnership:

I can't help but think the sudden drop in oil/gas prices has something to do with the mid-term elections approaching in 5 weeks. Demand is still high, the pipeline in Alaska is still broken, yet prices "suddenly" drop.

Nobody can convince me that this administration isn't in cahoots with the oil industry. I will bet anyone that as soon as election day passes, prices will rise.

The other day someone said that something was so hot "they could fry an egg on it." Why do people always reference the frying of an egg to express how hot something is???? It does not take much heat to fry ann egg......I think we should start a new phrase.

The regular season in baseball ends on Sunday. My weeknights won't be the same. Sure the playoffs start next week, but those games are intense! There will definitely be sleep deprivation the next few weeks during the playoffs. The games start at 8:20 and usually don't end until midnight. Then you are so fired up, you can't sleep. A very good chance for an all NY World Series this year...should be interesting!

Fillet O'Fish

  

I don't "dine" all too often at fast food restaurants. Once every three months or so, I will get a craving for a Taco Bell taco, McDonald's fries, or a Whopper. Not the healthiest choices in the world, but not too harmful if you don't eat them too often.

While in NYC on Saturday, I saw a poster at a bus stop advertising the "Fillet O'Fish" sandwich at McDonald's. I always knew they sold this particular sandwich but it was on Saturday that it dawned on me..."who is eating these fillet o' fish sandwiches?"

I mean, if I want fish, I'll go to a seafood restaurant or I will cook it myself. But, McDonald's for fish? The poster went on to boast about how fresh this fish is...fresh? Are they sending a couple of employees out each morning before the store opens with rods, reels, and bait? God only knows what is in their tartar sauce......

I also find that these "fast food pizza" places are getting waaaaaay too creative thinking up these new types of pizza. The latest..Lasagna Pizza at Pizza Hut. What fat fuck is thinking up these ideas? Like lasagna or pizza isn't bad enough on their own...let's incorporate the two. Stuffed crust pizza, upside down pizza, you name it.

I'll stick to regular pizza, fish from a fish market, and an occasional McDonald's french fry.....

Monday Exhaustion

Shouldn't you be rested and ready to go on a Monday? I am absolutely exhausted today! But, I had a great weekend.

Friday Night I went for my run after work in the middle of a wind storm. It was one of the toughest runs in a long time, but I got through it. When I got home T-Unit was arriving at my house. I showered up and me and her went for a nice dinner down the street at a "family style" Italian place. It was nice to eat "real" food for the first time in a couple of weeks. After dinner we watched the rest of the Yankee game and just hung out at my house with Brucey Boy.

Saturday I woke up early and ran a couple of errands. Sugar V picked me up around 10:15am and we went to his house to begin our little NYC adventure. When we arrived his wife Nebraska Girl and KW, the very nice young lady Sugar V works with were waiting for us. We walked over to the train station and caught the train to NYC. As usual our conversations were hilarious, complete with tons of insults...all in good fun of course. When we arrived in NYC's Penn Station, we caught a Subway downtown to the South Street Seaport. We had plans to the the "Bodies" Exhibit down there. We stopped off for lunch at a little outdoor restaurant before proceeding to the exhibit.

Sugar V and I were a little leary of this exhibit. We weren't sure how it was going to be. It was actually very fascinating. After the exhibit which took us about 90 minutes, we walked through Chinatown, to Little Italy where the Feast of San Gennaro was being held. It was so crowded and stuffy, so we decided to hop a Subway to Brooklyn, the Sugar V's old lesbian neighborhood for some window shopping/shopping/eating/drinking.

Park Slope was very nice. We had a great dinner and found a little spot for drinks where we sat for a few hours. About 11 Kettle One and orange juices later, I found myself BEHIND the bar with the bartenders serving shots. We had a blast.

The train ride home was humorous as well. We got back to Sugar V's place around 2am where he cooked up some pasta with his world famous sauce. It was a scene straight out of Goodfellas, eating a pasta meal at 3am. Around 3:45 KW left and Sugar V dropped me at home.

I was all set to sleep in, but the dogs woke me up at 8am wanting to go out. I could not fall back to sleep. I got up and showered and got my day started. At noon I picked T-Unit up and we met her brother and his girlfriend for lunch, then we saw Jackass 2. It was pretty humorous. After the movie we headed to my house and crashed watching a movie.

It was great hanging out with Sugar and Nebraska..and of course KW. I hope we have another little adventure soon. How was your weekend?

The Snooze Button

  

I have a very accurate and reliable "internal" clock. Each morning, I wake up 15 minutes before I have to automatically, without an alarm. My body just knows it is time to wake up. Even on weekends, when I can usually sleep a bit later, I will wake up very close to the time I decide the night before. It is pretty strange. It has never failed me, ever...so it is kind of great in a way.

Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against anyone who relies on an alarm clock each morning, I think that is the norm. What annoys the shit out of me is people who use the snooze button for an hour. I think it is pointless.

It is especially bothersome if you are dating/sleeping with someone who relies on that alarm clock and uses that snooze button. Especially if you don't have to be up first. They just hit that button every five minutes for an hour and you just want to snap.

What I don't get is how someone can fall back to sleep KNOWING that alarm will be buzzing in five minutes. I mean, seriously, if I wake up to pee within a half hour of the time I have to be up...I can't fall back to sleep.

I guess my annoying habit is sleeping with the TV on all night.....with the volume off. The flickering light of the TV soothes and helps me fall asleep. I like waking up and turning up the volume to listen/watch the news. I like to know what's going on in the world/in New York before I leave the house.

What's your take on the snooze button?