"The Rising"........Five Years Later

I remember that hot and muggy night very well. I find it difficult to believe it has been five years already. July 31, 2002. At midnight on that date, Bruce Springsteen's "The Rising" was released and I was one of the first on line to buy it...but at that moment, I had no idea what I was in store for. Up to that point, I owned every Springsteen album, seen him in concert fourteen or so times, watched all his dvd's and videos...so I really did not expect him to top anything he had done prior....not with his track record. Was I wrong.....

The events of September 11th, 2001 were still fresh in all of our minds here in the NYC area. Soon after the events of that day, Bruce Springsteen was approached time after time by fans and people on the street. They would say "Bruce, we need you now." They wanted him to write something to describe how we were all feeling....the sorrow, the emptiness, the anger, the loneliness, the shock, and the need to regroup and rebuild. Not only rebuild our city, but our hearts, our souls, and our will. The genius of this album is that these songs can be applied to that event and also to the happenings in our every day lives. That is why this album was and is so personal to me.

Just two weeks prior to the release of the album, I ended a four year relationship with someone. I was living with her when I ended the relationship. It was a very difficult decision, but something I knew was best for the both of us. Although she did not officially "move out" until late September, it was like my life was in limbo. All her clothes and belongings remained in the house for those 10 weeks while we lived separate lives. She would stop in on occasion, but mostly she stayed elsewhere. It was a tough thing to go through and I had many emotions about the situation and my decision.

When I purchased the album that night... I immediately opened the plastic wrapper in the car and put the cd into the player...as I pulled out of the parking lot of Tower Records, "Lonesome Day", the first song of the cd started...and I was immediately captivated. The music just put me in a trance...then the opening line.....then the chorus....and I immediately connected.......I understood the 9/11 undertone, but I also applied it to what I was going through. Once again, Bruce was my voice....he was singing about things I was feeling. That is why I've loved his work all my life...he always found a way to sing about things...every day emotions, that I had often felt.

With each passing track, I felt as though I told him what was going on in MY life and he wrote me an album...that is how personal this album felt to me. I don't remember seeing the road or how I navigated home that night.....I was so caught up in the music and lyrics.

"Into the Fire" brought tears to my eyes.....a song about the firefighters who were going up those stairs while everyone else was coming down.....the way it was written was so eloquent and so descriptive...."Empty Sky" had such a personal meaning, yet I related it so well to 9/11 and what we all felt that day and in the days following. "You're Missing" made me completely lose it. If you know the lyrics, you'll know why.

Then there were songs of inspiration on the album that got me charged up after a somber song or two. "Waiting on a Sunny Day", "The Rising", "Mary's Place", and My City of Ruin" gave me chills and hope. These songs challenged us to have faith and hope and to carry on.

I'll never forget where I was on that September Day...just as I will never forget where I was when I first heard "The Rising." I drove around for miles...way past my home that night...until I heard every note, every word, every beat. I finally went home, completely in awe. I placed the cd in my bedroom stereo, lit a candle...and listened to the album again....

Just two weeks later....I went to Madison Square Garden to see Bruce in concert. I had seen him fourteen or so times before that night...and I knew how electric his shows were. That night, there was something different in the air....in the eyes of everyone...long before the show started. As he came out, he started the show with "Empty Sky" and there really wasn't a dry eye in the "world's most famous arena" during that song. What amazed me that night was how everyone knew every word of that album. It had just been released two weeks prior.... I was blown away.

A few weeks after the concert my ex moved out of the house. Although, sad, I was relieved that we could carry on with our lives. A close friend of mine suggested that rather than moving out of the beautiful home I was in, that I find a roommate....and he suggested his brother Alex.....

Alex who was a huge music fan and musician moved into the house in early October. We immediately became close friends. He was not a Springsteen fan at all...but he was looking for some good music for his hour train ride each morning to work. I suggested "The Rising" to him. He reluctantly burned a copy and took it to work that day with him. That night, he walked in the house with a different look on his face. I asked him what was wrong. He said that he was completely blown away by the album and that he couldn't stop listening to it. He told friends about it, and they too were hooked.....

So for any of you who don't own the cd....either buy it, or buy some of the songs I mentioned from ITUNES....you too, will connect with these songs.....

You Can Always Go.....

Downtown. Great song from the 1960's by Petula Clark.....but I am talking about the other "downtown."

It is 2007 and there are still guys/girls who won't go "downtown" for their partners. Can you believe this? I am stunned when I hear things like this.

Taking a trip "downtown" is one of my favorite things to do in the entire world...no joke. I could spend a weekend down there. I am like Magellan circumnavigating the globe......or Ponce De Leon looking for the fountain of youth.......I love the exploration and the expedition of it all......

Anyway, ladies....what percentage of guys would you say have no clue what they are doing when they go "downtown?" Like what percentage are good compared to bad? From the stories girlfriends have told me about their exes and female friends that I have/had, it sounds like a good majority of guys are clueless when it comes to taking a trip "downtown" which is a big shame. There should be classes or books on this. At the VERY least, these guys should be talking/communicating with their ladies to find out what/how their woman likes it done...I think that is the key....

From a male perspective, I would say......50-60% of women really aren't that good when they take the downtown tour. They are all over the place......they are like Lewis without Clark.....they need some guidance......

Anyway.....I'd love all of your input on this topic...I find stuff like this intruiging! I will leave you with "Downtown" as you reply......because when I have worries...I can always go............"Downtown." There may not be movie shows down there.....and the lights may not be brighter there.....but it sure makes me forget about my troubles and cares.....

In the Dog House

Although it was only a four day work week for me, I am shot! I am glad the weekend is drawing closer.....

I have a lot on my mind this evening. This whole Michael Vick dog fighting thing has me very upset. Has the world gone completely insane? I look at my dog, and I couldn't even picture hitting him when he is bad....sure he gets an occasional smack on the butt to remind him who is boss when he misbehaves.....but having dogs fight to the death? That is beyond my comprehension. I read the Federal Indictment papers at lunchtime today and I cringed. The things he and his friends/family allegedly did to those dogs makes me want to drive back down to VA and kick all of their asses. Shooting them in the head, electrocuting them, torturing them....how could anyone hurt a defenseless animal. They are not men, they are pussies, flat out pussies.

Which brings me to the next thing...don't these millionaire athletes have anything better to do? The problem stems from these guys who grew up with nothing all of a sudden having the means to do anything and still hanging out with the crowd they did in high school.....sure it is nice that these guys want to "not change" and remember where they "came from" but there comes a time where these so called "role models" who are in the public eye have to separate themselves from the crap and the "crowd" they grew up with.

Why is this behavior off the field/court mostly prevelant in the NFL and NBA???? You don't hear of hockey players killing their wives, getting arrested 10 times in two years, running dog fighting rings, etc.....what is up with pro football and basketball????? This makes me look at my favorite sport in a whole new light. If all we have to complain about in baseball is Barry Bonds shooting up with steroids and breaking Hank Aaron's famed record, then we are in pretty good shape. Sure we can look back on Dwight Gooden and Darryl Strawberry...two definite first ballot Hall of Famers who threw their lives and careers away with drugs...but the big difference there...they only hurt themselves. They weren't involved in night club shootings, killing dogs, murdering their wives, and all the other bullshit behavior. The NFL and NBA need to tighten the rules. I say, if you get arrested and convicted of a felony, you are banned for life, period. The only way to hurt these guys is in the wallet....where they won't be able to live the lifestyle they live anymore.

Sure, he is innocent until proven guilty...but in the court of public opinion, this guy is done. This is a FEDERAL indictment...not some loose cannon district attorney in NC doing something to secure a political future like in the Duke lacrosse scandal. The Feds win 95% of these cases and don't indict unless they have a pretty iron clad case. If he is convicted, I hope he and his buddies rot in jail for a long time and that he never plays another down in pro football.

This dog fighting seems to be a pretty big thing around the country. I hope this brings it into the light and that these animals are saved and people start turning these illegal rings in.

Food for Thought.......

Mustard companies really need to start making mustard containers that don't squirt out yellow water before the actual mustard comes out. I bought some cold cuts tonight with a roll and French's proceeded to pee on my sandwich. Kind of takes my enthusiasm away for that sandwich. I guess I could shake the mustard a bit before using it, but f them, I am a consumer! Not only should they make mustard to my taste specifications, it should also give me my full day supply of vitamin C, whiten teeth, and give me a burst of energy......

Speaking of food, women of the Food Network have to stop faking orgasms when they taste their food. Half of that programming consists of cute, spunky women putting things in their mouth and giving us their "O" face. Which is why I can recite 23 different pasta recipes and 18 chicken recipes from memory, and I haven't cooked in months. Rachael Ray makes a 30-minute meal, and I'm finished in 20.

The Chinese community must explain why Chinese restaurants are never open for breakfast. There's a billion of them. They can't all be sleeping in......right???

Speaking of restaurants....I hate when they make you wait until the rest of your party has arrived. Any restaurant that makes you wait is calling you a liar. They're saying, "You have five friends?" "Yeah, we'll see." Listen up, Miss drunk-with-power-restaurant-hostess, when I say my friends are on the way, they're on the way. Soooo...get me to my table now or this is the LAST time I celebrate a birthday at IHOP!

Back From Vacation!

Hello all! I am back from NC and settled in. The drive was long, but very fun! Jen and I had a great time with my brother. I have attached some pictures below. His new house is amazing. We had a lot of fun and did a lot down there. I finally got to the outer banks/Cape Hatteras...a place I have wanted to visit for a long time!

Here are some things I learned/observed on our trip:

We really get ripped off here in NY, for EVERYTHING. Whether it be for gas, for food, for housing, or whatever, we get screwed.

Outside of NY and NJ, the beaches are FREE! They actually charge $10 EACH per visit/per person here in Long Beach to just go on the beach. Crazy huh?

The states that charge road tolls have the worst roads. It is $10 to cross the Verrazano bridge here in NY, yet the roads around it are horrible. The roads down south are free, smooth, and CLEAN!!!! Makes you wonder where all the money is going up here....

I would not live in VA if you gave me a free house. I just don't like VA at ALL!!!!

I need to get satellite radio. We had it in the rental car and it was amazing.....

Speaking of rental cars, I need to buy the model we rented. It was a 2007 Charger. (see pics) This thing kicked some serious ass. This thing went 80 by just touching the gas and it was amazing on gas.....weird, huh?

On the topic of gas.....I drove 200 miles from the Outer Bank area to Raleigh using only a 1/4 of a tank......in NY I used over 1/2 a tank driving 50 miles.....congestion, congestion, congestion.....

People down south really don't hate NYers......they were very nice and welcoming everywhere.

The nightlife here in Long Beach is bigger that the nightlife in the capitol of NC...by far! Raleigh was fun...but they need to step it up a bit at night!

Everyone stays to the right on all highways and interstates from Virginia...south. we basically had our own lane (the left lane) for about 250 miles. Thanks to all that stayed out of our way! :)

Cape Hatteras and the Outer Banks are amazing.

Five straight days with Jen.........and we got along great...even though I can be annoying. :)

I did miss NY, but this trip opened my eyes up to how difficult it really is to live here. Financially it is tough, we know that. From a stress standpoint, the pace and the attitude here compared to other places is extreme. Just north of Philly, I95 becomes a speedway where highway rules, safety, and consideration of everyone else are forgotten. It is every man, woman, child, invalid, and senior for themselves from Central Jersey through the NY Metro area.

My company can't function a day without me. Enough said. I am dead tomorrow. Over 200 emails to answer and God knows what else on my desk. Within 20 minutes of leaving there on Wednesday....the phone calls started.....it is a slow death working there.

Bruce, and dogs for that matter, really have no conception of time. Although Bruce greeted me a bit more intensely than he usually does when I come home from work.....within 2 minutes it was business as usual with him.....

I have jotted a few "blog topics" down over the last few days that I have wanted to write about. But, I'll put those on hold today. While browsing other blogs today, I came across Kate's which I usually read whenever I have time to read other blogs. She posted yesterday about 10 things you want to say to people, but can't, or perhaps you can but probably never will, for whatever reason. The key is to not let others know who each statement is directed towards. I found this concept really cool. I may write one or two things I can and maybe will say to the person....but for now....here goes:

1) Twenty years? Where have they gone? I think of you every day and know that despite my flaws and the mistakes I've made in my life, you would have been in my corner every step of the way. Knowing that has gotten me through a lot. Thank you and I miss you!

2) When I think of you, I can't help but think of the song "Someone Saved My Life Tonight" by Elton John. Especially when he says "You almost had your hooks in me didn't you dear? You nearly had me roped and tied. Altar-bound, hypnotized. Sweet freedom whispered in my ear, You're a butterfly, and butterflies are free to fly. Fly away, high away, bye bye." How fitting. Meeting you changed my life, in a very bad way. I am grateful I had the strength, the intelligence, and the love for myself to finally break free of you and get my life back on the path it was on before we met.

3) In a family full of giving people how did you turn out so fucking selfish? No matter what crisis you faced in your life, I was always there. Then you turned your back on me. It bothered me for a long time, but now I am at peace and take things at face value. You were selfish as a kid, selfish as a teenager, and even more selfish as an adult. It will not bother me if we never speak again.

4) Since we are on the topic of selfishness, I may as well get you out of the way. Any friendship, relationship, living situation, etc., requires both parties to give as well as take. All you did was take. You only "gave" when you felt guilty and knew you were taking advantage of me and my goodness. The year I knew you felt like ten. I am glad you moved far away so I don't have to see you ever again.

5) You ruined this country. For six years I have had to sit back and watch scandal after scandal, casualty after casualty, and poor decision after poor decision. Not to mention arrogance, dishonesty, stupidity, ignorance, and self righteousness. Thank God your days are numbered.

6) Your friendship means more than you know. Your guidance, honesty, and candor helped me during a very difficult situation. Had you not been there, my life today would be on a completely different course. One that would have been harmful and toxic for me. Thanks for making me see the light.

7) Meeting you has inspired me and allowed me to believe in people again. As cynical as I am, you bring out that "naive" side of me that I had when I was younger and less jaded about the world. You bring out the best in me no matter how bad of a mood I may be in. I've realized that "this" is the way it is supposed to be...in every way. I am grateful each day to have you in my life.

8) You need to take a class or two about manners. You'll never get respect from anyone when you act the way you do. Respect has to be earned and should not be taken for granted. You can't lead people that don't respect or believe in you. You are rude, sarcastic, and downright mean. Bottom line, even if I told you this, you would not care.....selfish people usually don't.

9) People always say that someone can't be friends with an "ex" for some reason or another. I think we have proved that theory wrong. We genuinely don't see each other as "exes" but as friends. We have both found our special someone and I am so happy for both of us....I couldn't have scripted it any better if I tried. I value your friendship and can't wait for us to meet each other's significant other.

10) Last but not least. Your friendship means a lot to me, but I can't figure you out. I make an effort to keep the friendship going, but sometimes I don't feel the effort back. I initiate gatherings, activities, and nights/days out but feel like I get turned down 90% of the time. When we do see each other, which isn't often anymore, we always have a great time, lots of laughs, and good conversation...so I don't understand. We saw each other a lot last year when another party was involved, but since then, nothing. I don't get it.

On the topic of "Speaking Your Mind"...this ROCKS!!!!!

Back From One Break....

And almost ready for another! Hey everyone. I am back from a very nice and long five day July 4th weekend. It was great! Here's a recap:

Tuesday Night Jen and I went to dinner here in town to kick off the weekend. After dinner, we got ice cream and went to visit my old neighbor Mario. He is 78 and lives with his handicapped daughter. I miss living across the street from him! Anyway, Jen and I brought him and his daughter ice cream and we sat with them and talked for a few hours. Mario broke out all his old pictures of when he was young and worked on a cruise ship, pictures from Italy when he was a boy, and dozens of others. I find his experiences and his perspective of the world very interesting. He was so surprised and happy to see us.

On Wednesday the 4th, Jen and I got up and did our run. It was hot and humid! We then played beach volleyball with one of my roomies and her friends. It was interesting playing volleyball in a sustained 40MPH wind and in a steady rain...but it was fun! We then went back to my house for a bbq and played some cards and hung out.

The rest of the weekend consisted of trips to Queens, cooking dinner together, a night on the town on Friday, TWO very nice bbq's. One of which is featured in the picture above. That is Jen and I at my friend Christina's bbq this past weekend. The weekend also featured the Live Earth Concert, Yankee Oldtimers' Day, shuffling our pets around and getting them ready for our trip on Thursday. Bruce will be staying at my neighbor's house where he spends his days and where he spent the weekend. Alice (Jen's cat) is already out east at her parent's house.

Thursday, I will be yet another year older..... (sobbing) We will be driving down to Raleigh, NC to visit my brother and my parents. We rented a cool car and we are looking forward to the long drive together. I am a HUGE fan of road trips. So, I couldn't think of a better way to spend it, with Jen and going to see my brother who shares a birthday with me....should be a fun time...

So, in the interim....I (and we) have lots to do. Packing, laundry, shopping, and everything in between. I am looking forward to getting out of NY for a bit.....the change of scenery will be good.

I hope you all had a great 4th and a fun weekend! I will check in tomorrow and Wednesday before our trip!

I've Got You.....Babe!

Another week is upon us! Thank God it is only a 2 day work week for me, as I took off Thursday and Friday. Jen and I have some fun stuff planned for the 5 day weekend including running in a July 4th race together here in Long Beach. Should be fun!

This past Friday Night was a lot of fun. After a nice dinner at "The Cabana" Jen and I stopped off at the liquor store to get some stuff for drinks. We went back to my house and we had a few drinks. Jen had her Kettle 007's and I had my Kettle and OJ. After a few drinks, we headed out to a couple of local places. We really liked one in particular. It is a new place this summer called "The Beach House." It is really a fun place. It was pretty crowded when we got there, but it was a good crowd. I immediately noticed this guy that stood out from the crowd. I'd say the average age there was 28-30. This guy was in his 50's and was a dead ringer for Sonny Bono. He was in the middle of the crowd and getting into the jukebox music well before the DJ came on.

We made our way to the bar for round one of drinks and headed to the back where the dance floor/DJ were. About 10:30 the DJ started playing music and Sonny Bono went NUTS! He was dancing like a madman all over the place. Being the instigator that I am, I kept pointing his way and saying "You the Man!!!" and making him go crazier. You'll see a picture of Mr. Bono above. It was dark and he was moving so fast it was difficult to snap a good picture......

About 11:45 my friend Christina joined us. I told her I was going to get Sonny over to dance with her. She told me she would kill me. So...when she turned her back...I pointed to Sonny, then pointed to Christina. Sonny immediately came over and summoned her to dance, but she strongly resisted and left Mr. Bono hanging!

We had a great time.....I hadn't danced outside of my old house (Club 69) in a while. The thing I found most interesting that night was the fact that even the really younger aged people there got into the "older" music more than today's music. Sure they were enjoying "today's" hip hop and rap music, but when the 80's songs came on, the dance floor filled up quickly.

The Beach House is great and I can't wait to go there again. The huge bar that was in the same place last year called "The Twisted Kilt" was never packed...this place packs them in...same location....very strange!

Everyone have a great day! :)