Overheard At The Beach

I hope you all had an amazing weekend. Mine was nice and enjoyable. Since the beginning of May, the weather here in NY hasn't been so nice. It was rainy and not to warm there for a while. About a week ago, summer arrived and my town of Long Beach, NY really came alive.

This weekend I finally got "on" the beach, as in bringing the chair, the towel, and all the other stuff and actually sitting/laying out for a while. When I first got there, it was pretty empty. I say got there like it was an hour drive instead of the 45 seconds it actually takes to get to the beach from my house on foot. Anyway, I closed my eyes for about 20 minutes and soaked up the sun. When I opened my eyes, the beach suddenly became packed and there were people all around me laying out and enjoying the summer weather as well.

As I rested, cell phones started ringing within an ear shot of where I was sitting. First this early 20-something girl answered her phone and bitched about her phone reception. It was her friend "Steph." She rambled on about her Friday Night with her boyfriend. How they went for dinner and ice cream then went back to his house and that she was bored as he watched some motorcycle racing show on TV. She then proceeded to talk about her having sex with him and mentioned that the dog always tries to get in the bed with them while they are fucking. She told her friend that he has no bedroom door so they can't keep the dog out. She also mentioned that when she was riding him, the dog was sniffing her ass and that it killed the mood. She said she got poff of him and went in the bathroom all upset. At that point, I had to cover my mouth with the towel so she couldn't see or hear me laugh. What is wrong with people? I don't have any problem with what she said, but how could she have no shame?

About 20 minutes later some dude's cell phone rang a couple of chairs over from where I was laying. He starts telling whoever was on the line that he picked up some fat chick at a bar on Friday Night and that when he took her home he was to drunk to get hard and fuck her. He went into graphic detail about her trying to get him hard for an hour and how it wouldn't move. He then proceeds to say that he went down on her and that it was nasty. Do we need to hear this on a relaxing day at the beach??????

To cap it off, another phone rang right next to me. This time it was a married woman talking to some dude she is apparently having an affair with. She told him she can't call him from her cell anymore because her husband saw the cell phone bill and was questioning all the numbers he did not recognize. In the same breath she asks him when they were getting together this upcoming week. "No, Monday is no good, I have to take Jonathan (I assume her son) to practice." Then he did most of the talking as she just agreed with whatever he was saying. She finally says, "oh ok, Wednesday is good, I will tell him I am going to the mall for a few hours, that should give us time." Again, I don't care what this woman does, but whatever happened to discretion? Does this woman WANT to get caught?

A few years ago, I never would have heard any of these conversations. With the advancement of technology comes some good little beach tales to discuss here on my blog. What's the wackiest phone conversation you ever overheard?